What you don’t know about me, is, that under the sun, I burn easily. Factor fifty regularly and thoroughly applied, combined with also trying not to stay in direct sunlight for longer than an hour or so at a time is usually the prescribed method applied when one finds oneself in a country that is not as cold as dead men’s spit.
So, running for my life naked across the blistering sands of Iraq’s answer to the Badlands, was not going to end pretty, either way, for anyone involved.
Why was I naked, you ask?
Well, that was my first mistake, and by God it was a big one.
The Tyrant had sent down a Gift. Fortunately for Grim he had just stepped out to drop anchor. Lucky bastard.
Meanwhile the ‘Gifts’ waited at my door, tits winking at me unashamedly.
I felt the blood rush as I ushered them in and they proceeded to take off what little strips of silk they still possessed.
Grim literally couldn’t have picked a better time to go curl one out and my smile stretched from my mouth to my…ahhh, yeah, I was very excited.
The three Gifts went to work and after a tantric couple of seconds I was totally naked. Scars and dints bared for the whole world to see, or they soon would be.
‘Drink, for you Mister Game’ Gift one insisted in perfect broken English, whilst she began the finger walk up my bared leg.
I virtually gulped it down. The second my throat closed around the clear liquid was the exact moment I knew that the Tyrant had finally had enough of my insubordination.
I needed to act fast, I had just swallowed some pretty serious tranqs, probably overdosed in all honesty.
The Gifts had quickly dropped the act the minute my glass fell from my hand.
I spotted the silver salt shaker on the table between the second and third Gift. This was it, the heel of my hand drove down on top of the first Gift’s elbow and with a smile I heard her shriek as her arm bent the wrong way.
One down. The next two were ready for me.
Suddenly they both had small knives, probably very sharp too. God knows where they kept them hidden.
I knew I should try to avoid them at all costs but they seemed to be moving super fast or maybe I was slowing down. I think I started to dribble, as I had a sudden on rush of saliva. Only one thing for it, I decided as I spat at Gift number two. Good shot too as I took out her eyes. Then, snatching the salt up I turned tail and legged it, clumsily out of a series of suspiciously unlocked doors.
Next thing I knew my mouth was filled with salt and I was thoroughly retching up, still sprinting at full speed of course, naked – across an empty car park and off into the darkened desert beyond.
Gift three hot in pursuit.
To be continued…